Tuesday, February 26, 2013

The Dark Corner of Life


I love accounting because it is just like life itself. If you want to be happy, you need all the different areas of your life to balance. If you want to stay in business, you'd better have all your accounts in balance, too. There is usually an area in our lives where we hide difficult issues or simply store stuff that we do not want to deal with at the moment. For example, I keep a to-do list of things where I add issues as they arise during the week and then get to them on weekends. Some things stay there for months or never make it out at all. We also have a room in our apartment that has been called many names (office, crafts room, guest room), but it is basically a closet where all the miscellaneous items go. When my husband returned from his deployment, he added to it with his countless military supplies. It is a mess in there, and we usually keep the door to the crafts room closed. Do you also have a corner in your mind where you store miscellaneous thoughts and issues and you rarely address them? After a while, it can get crowded in there and it may even remind you of a scary episode from Hoarders. 

Well, in accounting, we also have an account where we place transactions that are sometimes hard to classify. Ironically, it is a liabilities account, meaning that we are liable for those amounts and will have to pay our dues at some time. Just like in real life: no matter how far we hide some issues, one day they will have to be addressed. My job is to keep an eye on this account and reconcile it every month, making sure that nothing stays there for too long. Doing this really made me think about my life and all the little things that I leave non-addressed. I have had my cross-stitching project on hold for a while. I need to finish it, but it gets pushed down the list as more important issues come up. I also wanted to do a ton of things during my David's deployment, but ended up only with finishing one book. No playing piano or learning another language. What happened? Life! I have recently heard a thought that some dreams should stay dreams forever, and even though I do not agree with this thought, I must admit that some of my dreams do stay dreams because I do not seem to have time for them. As another New Year's resolution, I promised myself to start looking at my to-do lists and cross off more items, whether after completing them or after deciding that I do not really need them there. It has been quite productive and added to my life satisfaction. Now that my husband is back, he helps me address the areas that long for attention. 

On the other note, there are sometimes issues that we hide and do not address because we cannot do so by ourselves. We are simply not strong enough. And that is when faith comes in. Some things were sent to us for this reason alone: to realize that we cannot and should not deal with them by ourselves. Admitting weaknesses is tough but definitely rewarding. When you let the Lord help you, your whole world changes, and the dark room in your heart fills up with light.